Friday, April 17, 2020

My Inside Out World

So I was watching Inside Out because I want my nephew to like all the same movies as me to because the Ultimate Aunt

Now I love this movie so much. From the first time I've seen it to the time that I saw it then, it makes me feel that I learn more about myself, my brain, and my emotions. There are so many things about the movie that I enjoy. I'll list them for you
This movie packs a punch of emotion
  • the memories making clicking noises as if they are made of glass is such a wonderful feature to add
  • the fact that by the end of the movie it says it's okay to be sad or multiple emotions at one time and you don't always have to be happy and joyful
  • showing just how quick depression can come and hit you, and some of the inner workings of how the emotions work inside you
  • Bing Bong and his sacrifice makes me CRY EVERY TIME WHY DID THEY DO THAT TO HIM?
  • the end credit scene with the cat's emotions because it's so true and I know that it's actually happening in my own cats
Watching this cinematic masterpiece, it got me thinking about what my Inside Out mind would look like. What are my core personality islands? Which emotion is sitting in the center seat at the console? And what strange memories from my childhood are still strong on the shelves and will never go into the pit? I'm honestly excited to delve into my mind and think about it.

My Personality Islands


Similar to Riley, I would have a friendship and family personality islands. the sublevels of the islands would probably be the little niches that my friends and I bond over, like the Twilight and Iron Fey books (I have a whole chat with friends who love the Iron Fey books and everything Kagawa). And with family I feel that I would have a sublevel of each side of the family, and one for 'family friends that are basically family' like my aunt Rachel and my cousins Benny and Christopher.

Another island I feel would be writing and reading. They've been such a big part of my life and such a large passion in my life that why wouldn't there be a whole island in my mind for it. Filled with all the different stories I am working on, the ones that I haven't yet written down, and the stories that have changed and shaped who I am as a person.

Language is also something I love in my life and I remember the joy that I had in my first French class, my first test that I aced, and everything after that. There are so many other languages that I want to learn as well and so my Duolingo account is about to get SWARMED with me learning everything from French (still), Icelandic, to Valyrian.

I don't know why but I feel like color guard would also be an island for me. Like Riley it was my sport of choice (even though I played soccer for 8 years and only did guard for 4). I felt free and in control in color guard. Being on the field with a flag or rifle in my hands was where I wanted to be all the time.

There's shocking no other major events in my life that I would think could become a core personality island. These are the only ones I can think of right now, and I think that's okay. I don't need to have too many.

Emotion-in-Charge


I feel like I took a similar journey as Riley in my head with Sadness becoming a more prominent role in my mind. I moved a lot in my middle school and high school years and my family went through money problems. I also got diagnosed with anxiety and depression during that time as well.

For me it seems that it's possible that either Sadness or Fear runs my head or they co-run my brain. Because fear is also a very big part of my everyday life. I want to stretch myself and my content and I get worried that no one will like it, it won't be perfect (which is the worst fear for content creators), and it just stops me from doing things that I am a bit passionate about.

I know that my own Joy is in there, and she does get her share of the control panel. I have a lot of good days and wonderful memories. But having the bad days that I do, I can't think that Sadness doesn't have a staring role inside there. 

Memories I Can't Forget


A lot of my memories are fun ones, or ones that are like deep-rooted in fear, like some of my nightmares I had as a child that would wake me up and have me crying. I remember then to this day and they still sometimes send a chill down my spine. Also regrets and mistakes of my past. They're always going to remain solid in my mind.

The things you regret the most, the things you always wonder 'if I had done something different' will always stay in your mind. I think it's a way for the brain to hurt us and also send us forward. Be better, do better, become someone better and stronger. While it is annoying that my brain sends those memories up a lot, it helps me know that I'm only human.

A funny memory that I will always remember is when I was younger and my mother accidentally (or so she says) left me at Hannafords after buying things for my birthday party. People always tell me if I go into stand-up comedy that I should always tell that story because I tell it well.

What is your version of Inside Out? Which islands/memories are the core of you?  I'd love to see how everyone else differs just like in the movie.


À bientôt!


Photo/Gif creds: emotions, core islands, long term memory, bing bong,

No comments:

Post a Comment

Barkskins by Annie Proulx

So this book was given to me by my French advisor as a gift before my graduation, and I was so excited to start it that I added it to my T...